Girl Scout Cookie Cutter

Insane Clone Posse: Dana Fox, Diablo Cody, Liz Meriwether and Lorene Scafaria.

The NYTimes Cady Heron Deborah Schoeneman pulls back the seven veils to flash us with a glimpse of the coolest chick clique since Heather, Heather, Veronica, and Heather:

Ms. Scafaria and Ms. Cody are usually not a duo, but half of a quartet. With their pals Dana Fox, who wrote “What Happens in Vegas,” and Liz Meriwether, a playwright-turned-screenwriter, they make up a Hollywood powerhouse writing posse who call themselves “The Fempire.”

“A 17th century Hungarian countess embarks on a murderous undertaking, with the belief that bathing in the blood of virgins will preserve her beauty.”

oh wait, that last bit leaked in from another post altogether. The Times article is much more informative and not at all patronizing:

“Some in the room tittered ‚Äî maybe even Twittered,” and “Don‚Äôt even try to credit their bankability to their looks.”

um, don’t worry, I wasn’t going to. Pretty much the furthest thing from my mind. What else can the Times tell us?

“Their four-way chatter is a thicket of one-liners and retorts that cannot be printed here…” and
“…all four wear the same gold necklaces with tiny heart pendants inscribed with words that can‚Äôt be printed here, gifts from Ms. Cody…”

Quote tease. Lucky for us, somebody at New York Magazine has some balls and they tell us what’s on the pendant (though wouldn’t it be a lot more fun to guess?) I’ll have to tell you the cutesy/naughty stuff after the cut, because it’s NSFW & WTFC.

yeah, I won’t milk it for suspense. The identical pendants these four ladies wear say, “Fuck My Face.”

Sorry. Don’t kill the messenger. Even without knowing all this too-much-information, we get a fairly good idea what it must be like to be the poor puppies in this photo.

…Whenever one of them has a movie opening, they all rent a white limousine and go from theater to theater to watch the first audiences react.

“We’re usually drunk by the third theater,” Ms. Cody said. “It’s super porno and tacky, and we love doing it.”

To be fair, I heard Noel Coward used to do the same thing. It’s not all fun and games and unprintable retorts though:

…not everyone loves these four women, and plenty are happy to say so (many of them anonymously). So among them there is also a battle-scarred camaraderie. ‚ÄúWhenever you have a project out in wide release, there are haters,‚Äù Ms. Cody said. ‚ÄúBlogs, imdb, Rotten Tomatoes, reviews. It‚Äôs a lot to deal with.

Did I hear a dog whistle?

‚ÄúI flew to New York a couple times to hold Diablo‚Äôs bag when she was doing press,‚Äù said Ms. Fox, who also held Ms. Scafaria‚Äôs handbag at the Toronto Film Festival.”

There were people who actually got upset that this article appeared in the Times Style section, instead of the Arts & Leisure pages. Seriously. There are others who get a bit huffy at the suggestion there’s something icky or sexist about the piece. Still others who cut past the silliness and seem to get it.

Me, I can’t help thinking of this:

I’d feel bad about posting that, except for this other enlightening slice from the Times about these four “glamorous” writers who “can command seven figures to write a movie that makes it into theaters with big stars.”

Then came Ms. Meriwether, a successful playwright in New York. Her agent, Cliff Roberts of William Morris, sent her first television pilot, “Sluts” — about a group of recent college graduates who move to New York —

Anybody want to suggest another pendant inscription?