Alec Baldwin says he’ll never never never host the Oscars again

There’s talk that Alec Baldwin is in talks to host a late night talk show on NBC at 1:35 a.m., as Jimmy Fallon and Carson Daley move up to earlier slots. Meanwhile Baldwin talks to THR about hosting the Oscars, a job he claims he’ll never never never do again. Suits me fine. Some days I can handle hearing Alec Baldwin talk like he’s got it all figured out but today is not one of those days. The only good thing about 30 Rock ending, for me, is the warm feeling I get knowing Alec Baldwin can’t win any more trophies for 30 Rock. In fact, I hope he takes the late late talk show gig so I’ll have a good reason to get an extra half hour of sleep ever night. I do like his thoughts here about the Oscars. He says this is “going to be one of the last interviews I ever do” which would be bittersweet if it wasn’t bullshit.

THR: You co-hosted the Oscars in 2010 with Steve Martin. What did you think of the reaction to Seth MacFarlane’s performance?

Baldwin: The Oscars is a completely thankless job. It’s really tough.

THR: So you wouldn’t do it again?

Baldwin: No. Never, never, never. And I enjoyed doing it. What the Oscars absolutely, unequivocally should be is a show with a little bit of entertainment and a very reverential overview of movies of that year. And that show would last about two hours, and it would be a very tight show with a lot of serious, cineastic appreciation. But the Oscars is also a television program that raises 90 percent of the Academy’s budget for the year in a single night. When the Oscars is three hours — when they bullshit you and say that the Oscars is running long, and that’s a problem — that’s not a problem. They’re making more money. So ABC and the Academy, they have no interest in doing a tight, better-produced show. They are forced, because of economic constraints, to have a flabby, tired show.

THR: And everyone who does it gets raked over the coals.

Baldwin: They need to gamble on the show, and they’re not gambling. I am a member of the Academy, but everyone who has done it lately has been crucified. So they’re not going to get anybody who is reasonably talented or special to take that chance anymore. They don’t pay you any money; the Oscars pay you like chicken feed. It’s all about the honor of helping to extol film achievement. But they’re going to have a tough time. I’m dying to see who they get to do it next year. They’re going to have to go dig someone up from a cemetery. They’re going to have to go dig up Bob Hope.

THR: Is there a living person you think would be good at it?

Baldwin: Ellen DeGeneres. She would work. Everybody likes her, and she can be edgy without being too edgy.