I’m Going to the Oscars for the First Time in 16 Years

On Saturday I will attend the Spirit Awards. The next day I’m going to the Oscars. I think I have a dress. I have earrings and I’m watching lots of makeup tutorials on Youtube. Oh, for the days before “mature skin.” I am grateful for the invite for the Academy. None of the complaints I have against the voters relates in any way to the well oiled machine that is the Academy itself. It’s a worthy and valuable institution. Everything they do speaks to diversity, evolution and preservation. It’s a shame their voters aren’t as up to the minute as the Academy itself. Either way, I know how fantastic the whole enterprise will be, given the Academy’s usual expertise in this area.

I will be seeing all of the stars in the galaxy. I am sure I will see lots of nervous people. I am specifically wondering how different the show will be from the way it’s seen on TV. I will be reporting from the inside. I do not know if I am allowed to use my phone, or tweet. With my luck I will get seated next to the costume designer who wrote me that angry letter. Good times.

My point in writing this is not to brag. Well, of course it’s to brag. But really, I’d like to hear from you readers – what would you most like to know about the event itself?